I keep learning about people from my past getting married, having babies, losing jobs, living lives. The internet is strange that way. I don’t need to know these things at all. Maybe I would have heard through the grapevine, but probably not.
I wonder sometimes who hears things about me. What things they might hear. People I can’t remember seeing pictures of Babybot and wondering to themselves how things have changed over the years.
Even my own life escapes me sometimes. I read posts from my old accounts. I don’t even recognize myself. I forgot a couple of big anniversaries this year. Maybe that means the past is finally past, I don’t need to relive certain things year after year.
Ten years ago this week I would have been just moving back to the college dorms. I went to local shows and knew the guys in the bands. I tried so hard to stay “off the grid.” (indeed, I couldn’t find any emails or blogs or photos from that time period). I thought I could change the world. I was just starting to learn about religion, real food, politics, relationships. I had already seen too much. I had already made mistakes, but college was about starting over. In 2003 I think I had things pretty together.